A woman's best love letters are always written to the man she is betraying.

Dearest Barnard,

I may have come off as standoffish, but I want you to know my true feelings. Please accept me as I am, for I have fallen head-over-heels in love with you. Others find your special interest in females as a fault, but I find it endearing. You will teach me the ways of the world like no one else can. I know you will love me too if you just look past my aloof demeanor, so please just say those wonderful three words: "I accept you."

I will be yours truly, forever and always.

Tram