I've forgotten the joy of driving your own car with the windows down and the music blasting. One of the best feelings in the whole wide world. It's kind of like dancing, actually. I remember distinctly this one scene at Prom where everyone started jumping up and down in unison to the beat. The strobe light was going and all of the sudden, I was lost and was part of the crowd. And I didn't mind it. It felt good to be part of a crowd to lose myself for a bit. I wonder why that is.
So, I've found out recently that one of my cousins has recently lost her virginity. It disturbs me for a bit.
Well, there's always four of us that have always been together. Over time, Mlle. Truong and Mlle. La grew closer together while my sister and I remained apart. Still, there were always four of us. Like, it's not even an option for one of us to get married and not have the other three be a part of the bridal party. It's just how it is. There's Mlle. Truong and I--we're the same age. Next is Mlle. La, who is a year younger but very mature. Then my sister, who's the complete opposite of everybody. Sure, there are four of us, but sometimes I think it's more like three of us adults and then a little kid. Now that one of them has lost her virginity, I feel so compelled to grow up too. The only reason why the other hasn't lost hers is because her boyfriend isn't interested in that at the moment.
Maybe the reason why I'm disturbed is because someone who grew up with me and is about my age has gotten so intimate with another person already while I have absolutely no experience at all. Plus, the only reason why I found out was because I found the Plan B thing on the bed, hidden under a mess of blankets. I was like, "Hey, [name], are you still a virgin?" Of course not. What a stupid question. She didn't answer, but she smiled. I was like, "You guys didn't use protections?" and she said, "We did, but it ripped." Then after a little bit, she started telling me more and more about it and about her boyfriend. He bought the Plan B thing. I didn't know it was that expensive. It is. Sixty bucks for one pill. But sixty bucks for assurance is a pretty good price.
Then me and that cousin hung out a lot all day. I met her boyfriend, who seems really nice, but she keeps him a secret from everyone in the family except for the few of us since he's black and the family is full of racists. We just talked about growing up and stuff, and I told her about smoking weed. She and the other cousin have always been more on the wild side, and me and my sister on the more conservative side.
Her graduation was boring, like all graduations, but I had this dress on and it was amazing! Everyone was complimenting me on it. And I was considering giving it away since it didn't fit right, but with a few adjustments, it fits me very well now...if I don't gorge on food since it's very form fitting.
I actually talked to M. Dow for a long time a few days ago. I hope he's okay, but I won't find out until Wednesday night.
Maybe the reason why I'm disturbed is because someone who grew up with me and is about my age has gotten so intimate with another person already while I have absolutely no experience at all. Plus, the only reason why I found out was because I found the Plan B thing on the bed, hidden under a mess of blankets. I was like, "Hey, [name], are you still a virgin?" Of course not. What a stupid question. She didn't answer, but she smiled. I was like, "You guys didn't use protections?" and she said, "We did, but it ripped." Then after a little bit, she started telling me more and more about it and about her boyfriend. He bought the Plan B thing. I didn't know it was that expensive. It is. Sixty bucks for one pill. But sixty bucks for assurance is a pretty good price.
Then me and that cousin hung out a lot all day. I met her boyfriend, who seems really nice, but she keeps him a secret from everyone in the family except for the few of us since he's black and the family is full of racists. We just talked about growing up and stuff, and I told her about smoking weed. She and the other cousin have always been more on the wild side, and me and my sister on the more conservative side.
Her graduation was boring, like all graduations, but I had this dress on and it was amazing! Everyone was complimenting me on it. And I was considering giving it away since it didn't fit right, but with a few adjustments, it fits me very well now...if I don't gorge on food since it's very form fitting.
I actually talked to M. Dow for a long time a few days ago. I hope he's okay, but I won't find out until Wednesday night.
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